Mystique Evolving: "No be only male and female, God create intersex" - Intersex lady share how life be afta BBC Pidgin interview

"Religion, culture and society dey make us believe say God only create male and female, but odas dey in between and intersex pipo be part of dem"

Na so Mystique Evolving dey try to make pipo around her understand life as pesin wey dem born as intersex.

For 2019, Evolving first share her tori wit BBC News Pidgin and now almost three years from dat time, she follow share how tins be now.

Dat time she bin share say bicos say she be intersex, to form stable relationships bin no dey easy.

But now, she dey happily married.

Yes o! Mx Mystique marry her "Mr Right" for 2021.

Some of di challenges she bin tok about be tins like support from family, surgery, achievements and even marriage.

Life afta di she officially come out as intersex

"My experience afta I officially announce to di world say I be intersex bin dey really positive and challenging.

"Afta dat interview a lot of pipo reach me, some bin encourage, a lot of pipo bin dey say dem no believe say we (intersex) dey for Nigeria, some wan find out more. Actually, pipo begin to propose. And dat part surprise me."

Na one di pipo wey reach out to propose na im she say "I-do" to.

Love and Marriage

Before she meet her husband, Mystique say she bin dey avoid relationships becos she no too sure. "No be today, I like you, I like you, I like you, di next tine dem don start to dey... you know."

She say she bin no even give her husband face di first time wey im bin dey come find am to marry, until di man make one statement one day.

"Im make one statement say as a mata of fact, I no want make you do di surgery, dat na why I dey follow you bumper to bumper. I dey tell myself say, na your kain pesin I bin wan marry wen I bin young but I no know say di future go be like dis."

Na dis point she decide to give di relationship a chance.

In her words, she tok say her experience wit her husband make her understand say: "For dis world wey believe dey say na just man and woman God create. Say odas no dey exist. But no! Odas exist. And if odas exist, dat mean say e get some pipo wey go love dis odas."

Her relationship wit her family

For 2019, she bin tok about how she and family bin no dey gel sotay dem claim say she be gay.

"...di last experience wey I bin get wit dem (my family), I almost die."

She tok say dem beat her wella, even cut her hair and drag her for floor and say na only her younger brother be her support.

Now she tok say afta dem (her family) bin see her first interview wey she bin do wit BBC Pidgin, dem come reach out.

"Dem cry as dem realise wetin I go thru be dis."

Mystique say all dis one surprise her but she bi no believe dem at first based on past experience but she say as time pass, she come relax to accept dem.

As e be so, her relationship wit her family don settle and dem dey on good terms.

Oda challenges

Mystique say one major challenge wey she bin get be say pipo around her begin question her identity especially pipo wey no understand di difference between transgender and intersex.

"Many pipo no understand say transgender, na gender identity, intersex na sex characteristics. So intersex pesin fit be transgender, fit identify as cisgender, fit identify as nothing."

She say di pipo wey condemn her pass for marrying her husband na her fellow intersex pipo.

"Three days later or four days later, dem lose hell on top our head. Dem drag us like generator. Even till tomorrow dem still dey drag us," she tok.

Dem even accusing her say she carry moni pay BBC to do her intersex story, she add.

But dis one no be true

Intersex meaning

Intersex na pesin wey come dis world wit two sex organs, man and woman.

Many intersex pipo dey confused about who dem be and which gender dem belong weda man or woman.

E no possible to categorise dis group of pipo as man or woman as dem no be any of di two.

Intersex dey for Nigeria as dem dey for all di kontris for world. But kontris wey officially recognise say dis group of pipo dey exist dey refer to dem as non-binary or odas. Meaning say dem no be man and dem no be woman.

Dem get many different varieties of intersex and most times e dey hard to know from small pikin weda dem be man or woman until di pesin grow.

Sabi pipo say one out of evri 2,000 pipo wey come world, one na intersex.

But e hard to know exactly how many dey for Nigeria as many of dem dey hide who dem be, and parents wey get moni dey sharply go do surgery for dia pikin wen im small.

Transgender na pesin wey identify imsef or im gender differently from di sex wey dem give am wen dem born am.

Some transgender pipo wan to do surgery to change from one sex to anoda. But many odas prefer to dey as nature take create dem.

Cisgender identity na pesin wey identify imsef or im gender di same as di sex wey dem give am wen dem born am.