Gorblimey! So Asem Darkey Ain’t Singing After All!!

The NDC never ceases to amaze me. I do not dispute that the party has some fine men and women in its fold. The irony however is, why the President contrived to surround himself with rouble-rousers, men and women of depraved characters and goddamned shameless liars is another matter! The list is endless but the following readily come to mind: Victor Smith, Hannah Bissiw, Kobby Acheampong, Baba Jamal, Agyenim Boateng, Kwadwo Twum Boafo and Koku Anyidoho; the President’s Spokesperson. Throw in the likes of Ama Benyiwa-Doe, Samuel Okudjeto Ablakwa, Ofosu Kwakye et al then your full course meal of ‘uncouth ministers and appointees’ is complete. Could it be that the true character of the President is evidenced in his appointees? That’s a topic for another day.

In the midst of the “Woyomegate”, the NDC in a desperate attempt to quench the flame of that wildfire arrested Asem Darkey at 37 Military Hospital with regards to the disappearance of the 77 parcels of cocaine in 2006. In Koku Anyidoho’s unguarded enthusiasm, he was quoted as saying that, “Asem Darkey is singing like a canary…” He went further to say that the “Limping Man” had named some leading opposition figures. Koku threatened and even issued a fatwa; that the borders of the country was going to be closed to prevent the named individuals from the NPP from leaving the country under the cloud of darkness. Koku enthusiastically charged the media houses in the country to rather champion his infantile effusions and leave out the “gargantuan” fraud Woyome and Betty Mould-Iddrisu had contrived to perpetrate against the nation. He succeeded though as for a fleeting moment, “Asem Darkey singing like a canary” became a media headline in the country. The President’s Spokesperson whose big belly appears to make him fart through his mouth rather than the natural channel suddenly assumed the position of the Security apparatus. How come the state’s investigative body decided to report to the castle which informed Koku’s proverbial “child-in-a-candy-shop” behaviour is another matter. From the time Koku informed the country of Asem Darkey’s “singing” prowess though, Ghanaians have waited with baited breath to hear the “Limping Man’s” song till now but nothing has happened. Coincidentally, chirpy Koku Anyidoho appears to have lost his voice and hasn’t been making any more of his squeaking noise.

Elsewhere in this write-up, I stated that the President has surrounded himself with rouble-rousers, men and women of depraved characters and goddamned shameless liars and readers are welcome to place the infamous Koku Anyidoho in the category of their choice. After telling the whole world that Asem Darkey had been “singing” to the security agencies “like a canary” by mentioning the names of leading opposition figures in the disappearance of the 77 cocaine scandal; his cacophonous lies have died it’s a natural death. Until recently though, Ghanaians weren’t any wiser as to whether “The Limping Man” was still singing or has stopped “singing”. Interestingly, Koku only cheer-led the “singing” Asem Darkey has ended up being the one to lose his voice on the matter. It is common knowledge that Asem Darkey had been in the country all along but no one bothered him until the scandal of Woyome’s fraudulent claim and subsequent payment came out in public domain. It is also not a secret that Asem Darkey was picked up at 37 Military where he went for medical attention. However, the NDC embellished the story to make it appear as if they had fished him out from a hide-out all in an attempt to paper over the nauseating daylight thievery perpetrated on the state by Betty Mould-Iddrisu and Alfred Woyome on Ghanaians. It is even being whispered that some personalities at the castle, the seat of government had sought to negotiate and bribe Asem Darkey to name some opposition figures to give the NDC some leverage in the media but after pondering on whether to take the NDC bribe or not, the man has eventually been “bold” to tell the NDC that he will neither take their bribe nor smear any opposition figure. The matter is now in the balance hence, the muteness from Koku Anyidoho. Gorblimey, so Asem Darkey ain’t singing after all! It is unbelievable how a presidential spokesperson could descend so low and drag the dignity of the presidency in a stinking mud. It is common knowledge that Koku lacks class but his crass tactlessness borders on stiff-necked idiocy!! This is the Spokesperson for President Mills and yet they wonder why the Presidency has lost respect!?!

Unsurprisingly, when the Accra High Court called the matter on Wednesday, 21.03.12, the prosecution led by Owusu Ameyaw, an Assistant State Attorney advised the court that they were “…not ready to commence prosecution now because Asem Darkey was not being cooperative.” The prosecution continued that they “…have not completed investigations due to the sophisticated nature of the case.” In the midst of the “Limping Man’s” non-cooperative stance, where now is Koku Anyidoho? Not too long ago, the President’s Spokesperson was doing the foxtrot to the “Limping Man’s” “canary” tune with his potbelly swinging from side to side like a pendulum. Why has the man suddenly stopped “singing” and gone mute and “not cooperating”? Ghanaians need answers to our questions. I dare ask Koku: what happened to the earlier tunes Asem Darkey was “singing”? How long has the “Limping Man” stopped “singing like canary” and “not cooperating” with the security agencies? Koku’s misplaced infantile zeal to score cheap political points jeopardised the case the moment he turned himself into the official mouthpiece of the security agencies when he announced that the “Limping Man” was “singing” the names of prominent opposition figures in the course of the botched investigation. His comments shot the merit of the investigation into smithereens and politicised the issue but now Koku’s silence about Asem Darkey’s non-cooperation with the investigative body is ear-splitting. I challenge him to come out and tell Ghanaians what the next move is.

It is interesting how Asem Darkey managed to fool Koku into schizophrenic blubbing. Perhaps the President’s spokesperson needs being schooled in the diplomatic sophistication needed for the office he holds else his own eccentricities would erode the residual respect left for the Presidency. The President wants the world to believe that he is upright person but ironically surrounds himself with people like Koku Anyidoho. The contrast is so sharp! In the mean time, Ghanaians await Koku as he clears his throat to give us another topic for discussion. For now though, the Limping Man is “not cooperating” so Koku: “You say wetin”?

Kofi Kyei-Mensah-Osei