Opinions of Sunday, 10 May 2009
Columnist: Kojok, Justine
Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.. says the good book. My mother adhered to this biblical principle in upbringing of her children.
Yesterday, I had a call from Ghana and it was my mom. She doesn’t call me unless she wants to discuss most pressing issues. I keenly listened to the sweet voice of the aged woman and she went like this. ‘Your brother brought to me one of the Ghanaian magazines and I saw your profile and your pictures in it. You look great and they wrote very good staff about you. I just want you to know that we are proud of you.’ ‘Thank you mum, your beatings paid off,’ I responded. ‘I am glad it did. You then thought I hated you. Now I am glad you understand what it meant.’ She whispered with pride.
Today is Mother’s Day 2009. 2007, I wrote extensively about mother’s day and I don’t need to revisit the nitty gritty of mother’s day. If you missed it, just click on the following link to read it https://www.ghanaweb.com/GhanaHomePage/NewsArchive/artikel.php?ID=123963 Mother’s Day is to honor our mothers for what they did for us, from pregnancy to our entire upbringing. My mom told me that my birth was a hell to her. I almost came out from her thin. I don’t know how it could be but it means the pain she went through during my birth was terrible. So sometimes I thought because of that she hated me and that called for the beatings I had from her at the time. But I was wrong. She gave us the real beatings and when she did that she made sure food was around. She would thrash you and give you food to eat right there, and you must finish before she left you.
Not only that but she also taught us how to respect the elderly, our neighbors, and friends. She taught us to fight for what was ours, and to close our eyes on what wasn’t ours. She taught us to work hard for there are rewards in it. She molded us to believe in ourselves and take ownership of our works and decisions. Our dad died when we were young but this strong woman single-handedly brought us up in the manner that we commanded respect in the village and its surroundings. Because of my mom’s discipline, I lived with many families and each family was proud to call me their son both at home and abroad.
Back in my phone conversation with mom, I told her how I was proud of her and thanked her for her beatings. I told her if I were there with her I would lie down and let her walk on me. She became offended and asked me why I should say those things. I made her understood that I owe her everything and that her decision to carry me for nine months was the most valuable decision. She wasn’t comfortable with that comments too. She knew there was something that made me said that and insisted that I shared it with her. I told her it was classified information which I couldn’t share it with her without permission from my friend Araba Princess.
I met Arab Princess recently during Easter Sunrise service at the Lincoln Memorial, Washington DC. She told me how she unilaterally aborted her child which her boyfriend prayed several years for. Her boy friend left her and she lamented and still in the state of regret. She told me she loves the guy so much so that she had some emotional shock when he left her. She has a new boyfriend now, yet she lament over losing Kwamena. Her story reminded me of how powerful a woman is. Our lives came from a split second of their decisions. With this in mind, I thought for the first time that my mum completely owns me and why wouldn’t I reverently lie down and let her walk on me? Our mothers are those who decide as whether to carry us through the nine months or abort us. They know who our real fathers are.
Now Mothers, we respect you and love you for the courage you have, the love you showed us even when some of us don’t respect or love you back. It is obvious that some of our mothers were strict disciplinarian like my mom and you developed hatred for her. Now you may say you are free from her and wouldn’t mind her should she need your help. Please think twice and reflect on trillions of abortions that went on at the time you were born. If she didn’t like you, she would have aborted you like Araba did.
I can hear you saying I don’t even know her, I was adopted. Yes it is true you were adopted and that is why you should appreciate your mom even more. Because she carried you in her womb for nine months and went through the vomiting, headaches, waist pains, etc. Our adopted mothers should have equal respect and gratitude from us. They took us to their homes and made us one of them when we were abandoned or when our blood parents were unable care for us. Our elder sisters and aunties who cared for us when mom left for eternity have paid their duties in our lives, as such they should be given their due recognition and appreciation this day.
Please send them text messages, cards, flowers today. Pick up your phone and call her right now before you finish reading this article. Tell them how much you love them and how much you appreciate them. Let your action speak to her emotionally. If you have not been in good terms, today should be the opportunity to break the silence.
Mothers, let me speak direct to you now. Children are a gift of the Lord and the fruit of the womb is a reward. Please treat them very well and train them in the fear of God, discipline them when necessary. Let them feel that you don’t hate them and that you do all that for their good. Don’t spare the rod and spoil them. Nonetheless, love them as precious gifts.
To the young women who are yet to be mothers, hear me today. Some of you just got pregnant and contemplating of going for abortion. Please don’t do it! The fetus is a gift from God and don’t reject the gift. I know you may be saying, ‘look at him, you don’t know what I am going through. I am not ready to have kids. I am going to school. I don’t have money to take care of the baby. I don’t like the father to-be. My parents won’t accept him in our family, etc.’ yes, your excuse is right and genuine. However God knows all that and yet He allowed you to be pregnant. You may say you have been doing the abortions and that you will get pregnant anytime you want. This could be your last gift that God gave you. I know some women who are going from one gynecologist to another, spending huge money to get pregnant but in vain. Think twice please!
To my mom and every single mom, this is what I mean when I call you mother.
Million things you gave me made my life complete
Only you know me best and care for me best
Tears you shed to save me is appreciated
Heart of purest love endures absolutely
Eyes with love-light shining on my life
Respectful you will always have from me
Thank you for being our mothers.
Happy Mother’s Day.