Opinions of Tuesday, 28 January 2014
Columnist: Sarfo, Samuel Adjei
The Attack of the Scavengers
By Dr. Samuel Adjei Sarfo
1. At that time, the sun had fallen, and its golden crescent appearing in the west heralded the fast approaching night. Great cloud had been instigated by the confusion generated by the great beast’s appearance, and all around us, the thick fog made visibility impossible even for the Enlightened One who must cut open the stomach of the great beast, and cure it of all ailments afflicting it.
2. Palpable silence besieged the shore, except for the occasional pounding of the waves against the benign promontory, gazing solemnly at the sea’s horizon. But Zarathustra was undeterred, determined to perform surgery on the grotesque beast.
3. That was when I, Sarfo the Black, Sage of my people, felt a certain vicarious attraction for the fate of the beast as if its destiny and mine were intertwined. Thus I silently wondered about the outcome of the operation which Zarathustra intended to perform upon the monster, conscious that there was too little light.
4. Besides, I was also astounded by the prevailing silence, because up to that time, Zarathustra, the Teacher of Issa, had not uttered a single word to me. I therefore proceeded to ask Zarathustra certain pertinent questions:
5. “Great Master, darkness is fast approaching, and yet thou insistest that thou shalt perform this healers’ art?”
6. “Indeed,” Zarathustra answered, and I noticed that his voice was as haunting as that of an echo in a cave, intimately hugging the evening silence. “The scavengers of the land are nocturnal beasts who will venture to disturb the procedure. But, I am the maker of fire, and for thy sake I command fire to light up this darkness!”
7. On the words of Zarathustra, a pillar of fire came from the sky, and aside lightening up the venue, emitted scintillating warmth which descended upon my shoulders.
8. “Suffer me once more, thou great prophet; what art the purpose of this surgery which thou must perform?”
9. “Thy people calleth this procedure Lithotripsy in the common tongue, but long before your race was born, the primordial ones called it Akahana.
10. The beast hast kidney stones which causeth it to fight against itself. This healing art breaketh the stones into tiny particles that can pass naturally through urination. But let us hurry, for the scavengers can smell the entrails of the beast from a hundred miles, and they will seek to interrupt us.”
11. Upon these words, Zarathustra made an incision on the stomach of the beast, and blood oozed out of the monster and entered the multitudinous sea, incarnadining the greenish waves and turning them all crimson.
12. This was a signal for the scavengers. Three of them emerged from the sea, looking like aborted hyenas and whimpering excitedly as they smelled the blood of the mighty beast. One by one they came, determined that Zarathustra’s healing art should not proceed.
13. The first scavenger wore the habit of an infernal panjandrum, and sported on its chest the inscriptions, “Apmaoko the Handsome One ” His voice was like a river of many words, mostly incoherent and malapropistic at best. This creature spewed words as the morning rain when the soggy sand has had enough.
14. He declared war upon the Enlightened One and proceeded to terminate the surgery of Zarathustra. But the holy one gave me a grim signal, and newly empowered, I picked up a mighty sword from the hand of the slumbering beast and brandished it before Apmaoko, the one who called himself The Handsome One and yet was full of stinking filth.
15. As if wounded by the brandishing sword, the panjandrum scampered back into the sea, uttering a million words in protest. When the creature went down into the sea, the second scavenger appeared. That one had a parasitic tooth akin to the ancient mammoths, and won its daily bread by attachment to a great scholar.
16. His name was Adaaku Saymen The Paramour, one that has perched with another for a decade and a half. He came at me with a fury of a scorned lover, reciting doggerel which he mistook for a song of Saruman.
17. He threw a blow at me and I ducked to the side. Provoked, he called upon the Denkyira god to curse me. But his voice stuck in his throat as a poet bereft of his own words.
18. I did not wait for a signal from the Enlightened One. I feinted a blow to hew off his head, and as he backed away, he fell into the ocean and was submerged under the crimson waves.
19. That was when the third scavenger appeared. He had the wings of a wounded eagle, and a flaming tongue that uttered stupidity as his stock in trade. His name was Rokor the Divine Fool. For three thousand years, ever since my ancestors emerged from holes from the ground in the Kintampo hills, Rokor has parroted unceasingly the voice of his master slaver whose falsehood set the nation back for one score year.
20. But Rokor met me fire for fire, for in his hand he also held the sword of a great clan and danced Agbadza to hold me enchanted, knowing fully well that I loved the dexterity of that dance. That was when I cried for help from Zarathustra. He took a castanet and composed a rival rhythm which confused the steps of Rokor, and broke down his spell upon me. Without a fight he fled into the sea.
21. “Well done” Zarathustra exclaimed. “The scavengers are the children of darkness, those evil scholars who Kumrahn’s lamb revealed to you in the first apocalypse. They are the destroyers of the unity and peace of the land.
22. Instead of truth they preach lies. Instead of unity, they preach division. Instead of compassion they are filled with hatred. They flaunt the emblem of their tribe in sacrifice of all tribes. They were nurtured on Kumrahn’s wealth, but they bleed his nation of strength.
23. They taketh where they have not saveth and reapeth where they never soweth. They demandeth too much from posterity, and yet giveth nothing back to the generations.
23. Their sins are upon their heads, and eternal folly will be their lot forever and ever.
24. El que tiene sabiduria, pidala a interpretar el simbolo de los carroneros, porque elos son los falsos eruditos de Anagh, y los profetas de la division.
Samuel Adjei Sarfo, Doctor of Law, is a private legal practitioner in Austin, Texas. You can email him at [email protected]