The husband pays the bills: McDan is absolutely right

In marriage, on the shoulders of men, are a plethora of responsibilities. These obligations are divinely enshrined. They must honour them sine qua non.

Even as boys, it’s our responsibility to take care of our sisters. When parents become sedentary and dotard, it’s the men who’re suppose to shoulder the bills to be incurred. They must! Their siblings (sisters) can

Read full articlechoose to hoard their money and they’d not be held responsible by God.

Going into marriage, this same principle must be a guide to men. Islam has it that “Men are the maintainers and protectors of women for that God has preferred in bounty one of them over another, and for that they have expended of their property…” (Quran 4:34)

For example, a husband can be likened to a car owner. It’s the responsibility of the car owner to maintain the car. Changing of oil, shocks etc., and above all, using it (car) efficiently and properly.

In the same vein, God has ordained men to maintain their women. That doesn’t mean women can’t take care of themselves. But the central rule is that husbands are to maintain their women. And to protect them; ensuring that they keep them in a good shape; in beauty, and contribute to their mental well-being better than even as they (wives) were before they (men) asked for their hand in marriage.

Have we, for once, ever asked ourselves why men are those tasked by tradition or divine decree to ask for a woman’s hand in marriage, and not otherwise? Does that also mean women (of today) can’t afford that “meager” or symbolic expenses men incur during marriage? They could, the women, and even do it better.

The truth is that responsibility hasn’t been given to them, it’s that of men’s. Women also have what they’ve been tasked to do. Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: “If a woman prays her five prayers, fasts her month of Ramadan, guards her chastity, and ‘obeys her husband’, she will enter Paradise from any gate she wishes.”

It’s solely the husband’s duty to pay for everything in the marriage. Utility bills, transportation, shelter, food, the maintenance of his wife etc. If she (wife) says she wants this type of dress, phone, meal, cream, car etc., the man chests the bills. And It doesn’t matter if the husband is rich or not, or the wife earns more. The least he (husband) can honorably do is to bargain or asked to be pardoned.

The wife, whatever money she contributes into the marriage, does so on a voluntary basis. If she decides to keep her money and even bill the man to buy her the overtaxed menstrual pad, bathing sponge, towel, soap, or whatsoever, she hasn’t erred and would still go to heaven. Whatever she needs to buy for herself it’s the man’s responsibility to shoulder the bill for her.

Despite all these privileges which God had given her, if she chooses to spend in the marriage, then that’s charity she’s doing for the husband. She’s doing their family a big favor. And her reward is humongous.

In some homes, sadly, women are too pressured that they become the men — they pay the bills — because their husbands do want to be responsible. This is unfortunate.

But wise men who, for some circumstances, had to relay the breadwinner job to their wives, would always do so respectfully and lovingly. They collaborate with their (wives’) to scale up their (wives) business.

There’s a man who helps the wife in her “Kelewele” business. Those men don’t sit at home to read newspapers, watch television, or play draughts, and when their women return from the market at night, they’d be making all the noise just to eat their favorite meat at dawn.

And if men think that just by taking care of the home they’re doing something at all, they should know that there’s no responsibility in this world which is heavier and difficult than bringing forth another human being into the world. Women have been doing this since time immemorial and they’re yet to complain.

It’s a westernized culture which cherishes the 50/50 contribution rule between a husband and wife. Even with them, this rule remains practicable during the courting stage, but as soon as the relationship is taken to the altar the man assumes the ultimate role of paying the bills.

Prophet Muhammad(ﷺ) said: “‘The best of men is one who treats his wife well and I, amongst you, am the best man with regard to the good treatment of my wife.”