Who Is the Liar Here?

By Kwame Okoampa-Ahoofe, Jr., Ph.D.

I, personally, like the man precisely because he plays politics the way it ought to be played - upfront and forthright, with absolutely nothing to hide, whatsoever. I may, however, be a little iffy in entrusting him with sensitive national security information and documents if I were in a position to do so. Of course, the man that I am talking about is the irrepressible Mr. Paul Collins Appiah Ofori. I also like the fact that the "Paul Collins" is almost never written out but rather "chicly" initialled as "P. C."

You see, I am generally peeved by "Negroid" Africans with too many European names either prefixed or affixed (or is it post-fixed?) to their culturally organic and authentic African names. I have the same sqeamish feeling about African Muslims with those more than mouthfuls of barely pronounceable Arabic names which they apishly and garishly flaunt and appear to so madly love over and above their far more organic and racially and culturally authentic African names.

My main hung-up, though, is that people who love and morbidly prefer foreign names over and above their own native African culture-derived names may definitely be suffering from an acute and, perhaps, irreparable case of inferiority complex and a blistering sense of self-alienation that decidedly renders them brain dead and very poor candidates for the kind of African cultural revolution that promises to return the primeval continent and its people to our glorious ancient past.

On this count, of course, while he may not be exactly what the proverbial doctor ordered, nonetheless, for his generation, Mr. Appiah Ofori sits comfortably among the ranks of the political front-benchers. And so when the retired New Patriotic Party (NPP) Member of Parliament for Asikuma-Odoben-Brakwa reveals quizzically that in the wake of his heavily blighted declaration as winner of the 2012 presidential election, Mr. John Dramani Mahama had invited him to his then-Osu Castle office to buy him over to the side of the so-called National Democratic Congress (NDC), and that he had promptly and roundly rejected the offer, you better believe him, particularly when the only person from the Mahama executive suite contradicting Mr. Appiah Ofori is that young certified congenital liar by the name of Mr. John Jinapor, the so-called Presidential Spokesman. Talk about "Show Me Your Friend."

According to Mr. Appiah Ofori (See "I Rejected Mahama's Ministerial Post - P.C. Appiah Ofori" Ghanaweb.com/Daily Guide 2/18/13), something about his admiration for the straight-shooting former NPP-MP had prompted Mr. Mahama to assay a buyout to his side of the political divide. I firmly believe that, contrary to what Mr. Jinapor would have the Ghanaian public believe, the meeting between Messrs. Appiah Ofori and Dramani Mahama, did, indeed, take place at the Osu Castle at exactly the time that the maverick former parliamentarian claims that it did.

It also rings perfectly true that a man purportedly desperately on the warpath to stamping out corruption from among the ranks of his own party and government, would direly desire to collaborate with another who has already firmly established his credentials as a corruption-busting human cluster bomb and hand-grenade fused together.

Now, let's hear it told from the horse's own mouth: First, the former Rawlings communication minister wanted "P.C." in his kitchen cabinet; and when he realized to his rude surprise that it clearly amounted to brazenly demanding the virtually impossible, the smooth-operating "Little Dramani" promptly lowered the bar of his Faustian bid down to the diplomatic level, a veritable sinecure, to be certain, which was clearly an unsound political strategy. For even a frisbee-snatching cocker spaniel would have found the latter bid to be too demeaning to be taken seriously.

Still, knowing "Mr. Laptop" and "Fa Woto Begye Toyota Land Cruiser" for who and what he plainly is, this scandalous assay at Nicodemian soul-trading staggers me none the least bit. Besides, even as Uncle "P.C." nimbly points out, after all, who wants to be the lone plaintive voice in a stygian den of irredeemable thieves and thugs?

Great man, this "P.C." Appiah Ofori feller, were you, my dear reader, to ask me for my honest-to-God opinion.